In an attempt to help their struggling team, the New York Mets have lowered the home run wall from 16 feet to 8 feet at Citi Field. There are two things that have me concerned about this move.
First of all, lowering the wall not only helps YOUR offense, but it also helps other teams’ offenses. If you think your team is going to hit more home runs because of the wall lowering, you need to be prepared to give up more home runs as well. When Johan’s ERA starts to balloon this season, you will only have yourselves to blame.
Secondly, what happened to the rest of the wall? Where did it go? Because I could not get a straight answer from the Mets’ construction crew, I decided to investigate the situation some more.
After searching day and night, I happened to come across Rex Ryan, the head coach of the New York Jets. Ryan was looking very odd, and he seemed to be a little wider than usual. That’s when it all clicked for me. REX RYAN ATE THE WALL!
So I asked him if he was indeed the wall-eater, and he said, “Of course. Look at me. Where else could it have gone!”
Now I understand that he likes to eat a lot of unhealthy foods, so does everybody else. But at least if you’re going to eat unhealthy, keep it to food! Wall is definitely not an option!
Filed under: funny, MLB Tagged: | Citi Field, Home Run Wall, New York Mets, Rex Ryan
